Monthly Archives: February 2017



What do we really own?

We have things in our possession, but what is our heart towards those things?

Do we take them for granted? Not care for them as well as we should? 

Whose money purchased the things we have?  

If everything was created by God and for God, what is it we really own? 

What do you want?

What do you need?

What SHOULD you have?

Who makes the ultimate decision?




All of it. 


To give of yourself is a short and simple concept. The action part is far more difficult.  We live in such a self and stuff oriented world. 

The world pushes bigger, better, more of this and more of that, to such an extreme the storage industry is a billions dollar business. 

Since 2014, the self storage options industry has grown each year for the past three years just over 1 billion dollars. It is estimated to make just over 32 billion dollars in the year 2016. 

Self storage stat link  

Where do we look to get help and what must we sacrifice to get to where we are supposed to be?

As the groom to my bride, I am to be a servant leader. Sacrifice as Christ has sacrificed, to the love and strength of our marriage and the glory and honor of God. 

God wants us to look to Him for our help. As soon as we loose sight of that, we become dependent on ourselves and things and that’s when life starts to go immensely wrong.

I’m not saying that having stuff is bad, or doing things for yourself is bad, but it depends on the condition of your heart when that time comes. 

As Jesus loves His Church, that is how I am to love my bride. He died for His Church literally. So that is the example I have to follow.  If called to, I must be willing and want to die for her. If not literally, physically, then I must crush my selfishness daily. I must choose my battles and pick my wars. I must pray before I speak. Pray before I act. Listen to Jesus and watch Jesus for what He says and what He does.

I don’t always do this, but it is the goal in the midst of my broken selfish life.

That being said, I must learn even more to be a servant leader.  To be self sacrificing does not mean to give up the leadership role in the home. I am responsible for the spiritual atmosphere of my home. If the spiritual atmosphere is not right, most of the time it’s because I am not right.

Now before we go further, please know and understand that we need to go back to His grace. Because it is not by works we are saved, but by grace through our faith. Also, however, faith without works is dead. I seek the fruits of the Holy Spirit as listed in Scripture, Galatians 5.

Grace. It all comes down to grace. Jesus’s daily gift of grace to me. My needing to pay forward that grace to my bride. To forgo the brokenness of our lives as individuals, and as bride and groom, and simply love. First Corinthians 13 speaks about love and how important it is.

It’s important to say that we do have disagreements and conversations as we work through differences.  This is a normal part of our life and relationship. But we always try and filter it through grace and love. When the filter is clogged with stuff, and we lack grace, there is almost always forgiveness that is asked for.

I like this song:  

Give me Jesus

Before we got married my bride and I discussed who comes first in our individual lives and it’s Jesus. We are next in line to Him. All else comes after; children, family, add yours from here. 

The Groom

Be in the world, but not of the world.

As much as we hear this phrase and think it’s Scripture, it isn’t.  It expresses the idea of how we are to be, but this isn’t Scripture specifically.

John 17 talks mostly about the phrase “in the world.” But doesn’t say not to be of the world. We need to look at other Scriptures to make this phrase complete. Scripture like the first commandment, have no other gods beside our Father in heaven. Exodus 20:3.  Then there is, “you can’t have two masters….you can’t serve both God and money.” Matthew 6:24.

Just for clarification, Groom capitalized means Jesus, because now I’m in a position to represent Him to my bride.  To love her as Jesus loves His Church.

This sounds immensely huge, but it is really quite simple.  Simple does not mean easy, however.

Jesus was a servant leader.  He lead by sacrifice.  He wasn’t a push over. He spoke what He heard His Father speak and did what He saw His Father do. As a result, this is how I am supposed to function in my marriage. Speak what I hear Jesus speak and do what I see Jesus do.

This should be done through prayer, study of Scripture, and wise counsel, which are areas I need to improve upon. 

As I look at the people around me, I wonder where the majority of their gaze is?  Are they looking horizontally or vertically?

Am I looking horizontally or vertically?

One is looking to the world and people, the other to Jesus. 

As my bride’s groom, I must look to the Groom of creation for my help and direction, all else leads to trouble. Speaking from experience. 


The wedding…

January 7th,2012

The day was here!

As bride and groom we really took a pretty good back seat to the planning of the wedding. We were included in some of the major decisions, but all in all our family and friends, that are like family, really took care of the bulk of it!

The added bonus was that my bride really did like surprises, so all in all it worked out well. A surprise wedding!

It was simple, but it was extravagant at the same time if that makes any sense.

We made sure certain people were definitely invited, however, we made it an open invite on social media.  As a result, we had over 200 people attend, packed the church, and it was standing room only!

For our wedding we really wanted to praise and worship our Lord and Savior, Jesus. We wanted to be married in the midst of a worship service, and that’s what it was. Both my bride and I were on the worship team. We choose songs that represent the love of Jesus and His sacrifice for us and the grace offered because of Him. It was amazing and perfect.

The reception was simple, with snacks, cup cakes, a coffee bar, and the like. We stayed for a little while and socialized with everyone, cut the cake, and enjoyed the atmosphere.

Jesus had done an amazing work in our lives. He had washed away all the sin and pain. He had made us both new as individuals and then new as a couple.

He had returned what the locust had eaten and redeemed us.

There was some push back from some people because of our previous marriages. There were those who thought we would be living in sin if we got remarried because of our past.

Our Pastor, who was totally supportive, even told us in love, that the odds of our marriage working, based on statistics, is not favorable to be successful!

We listened, we studied the word, we talked to those who are so much more wise than us in understanding the Scriptures and Jesus’s remarkable gift of grace.

For it is by grace we have been saved. Not by works. This grace works through every fiber and thought of our being. It is what washes clean the very fabric of our lives, completely.

Our marriage represents His forgiveness and grace and His ability to redeem anyone and everyone from their past.


Our marriage represents the depth of His love for us and His desire to bless us because of His great love for us.

Now it’s time to love my bride as Christ loves His church.

The name…

What’s in a name?

How important are they?

What do they stand for?

How influential are they….really?

James Patrick McDermott

That is my birth name. It is the name my parents gave me and I love the name!

I say it with the best Irish accent I can muster! It’s fun and I appreciate it!

But, yet I offered to change it, and change it I did.

Names are important. Scripturally, names are used to tell a person’s lineage.

The names have meaning and stood for something.

As far as influence, we see it all the time in society today. The name of business owners, politicians, and actors, there are people who make decisions that change the course of our society. Names that seem to have a minimal influence until a fateful decision one day changes their level of influence.

And then there’s the name of Jesus.  The name above all names.  The name that by grace through faith, we are saved.

In some translations, Genesis 49:10 uses the name Shiloh. This is part of Jacob’s blessing over his son Judah. It is a name used for our Messiah and stands for peace. It is the name of the city where the ark of the covenant rested. So it also means a place of rest.

There are times in Scripture where God changes the name of people.

We believe this is one of those times.